Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Holiday shopping

I did not participate in the madness that is Black Friday. Mostly because it is too dark and cold and you'd have to pay me to get up that early. But I have been to a couple of stores since then. Here is my report:

I went to Walmart the other day to return some spray adhesive that did not have a nozzle. I walked in, got my sticker from the Return Guy and headed to customer service. When I saw how far back the line stretched and snaked around I did a 180 and decided everyone needs a $2.96 can of glue that doesn't work. At least for the time being I will hold onto it and buy another can, with a nozzle, rather than do an exchange. Those lines were much more manageable. In fact there was no waiting at register 25. At least not before we got in line.

I'm pretty certain that whoever invented the whole self-checkout craze did not go shopping with 3 kids by him/herself. Kid #1 kept insisting that she wanted to scan "just one more" item. Mother kept insisting not today. "Look at the line. There are like 12 people behind us now. I said you could do one!" Kid #2 kept grabbing everything he could reach off the conveyor belt just because he could. Kid #3 was pretty much just sitting there looking cute. (Thankyou!) But the machine kept yelling at me to place the item in the bag. It's in there, I swear. I do want to bag the item. I did bag the item. What do you want from me? My firstborn? She's yours. (I'm totally kidding!)

Today I thought I would brave Target (while kid #1 was at school). I'm laughing as I type this. If only they had had a self-checkout! I finished my shopping and got in line. Again, no waiting. The little Grandma behind the register, (and I mean my Grandma's age, not my Mom's age who is a Grandma) handed me my diet cola and said, "You need to read those numbers to me. Starting from here all the way to the end." Her problem you see, was that she couldn't see. And the little bugger wouldn't scan for her. And in her defense those numbers (all 59 of them) were really really small. So I started reading the numbers to her. I was almost at the end and she sighed, kind of annoyed-like and said, "you'll have to start over. And you'll have to talk loud. I can't hear you." I almost busted up. (Maybe you had to be there.) So, I started over. Very loud and slow, 3...7...2.
It took... a while. But eventually that diet Coke was mine. And one never tasted so good I tell you! Totally worth the wait! (All 37 minutes!)

I think tomorrow I'll shop online.

11 comments:

Beckii said...

You are so funny!! We actually did brave the worst shopping day of the year, and got all of our Christmas shopping done (wow! that feels good!). The lines were RIDICULOUS! Our Target had a line waiting for doors to open that wrapped all the way around the building. I actually did something that I hate it when people do and hid something behind the fridge-mate boxes of soda at ShopKo and we went back a couple hours later; much shorter lines. Every year I say I won't do this again and every year I keep going back. It's a cheap-o syndrome I can't seem to shake. Apparently the $7.83 I saved is worth it?? Really, is that all I saved? Please, do me a favor, and remind me of this next year . . .

Melissa said...

This post was hilarious! I am so not all about the Black Friday shopping either. I actually haven't done any shopping since before Thanksgiving. I guess I better get going on that. :)

InkMom said...

Have I said before how much I hate WalMart? Seriously -- my life is happier since I stopped going. I'm nearing the two-year mark.

So, so, so funny. I have been there, and it's definitely reading about you doing it than actually experiencing it myself. So let's just keep up this little relationship, okay? You can take all your kids shopping and I'll read your posts all about it, and then I can live vicariously through you and miss out on such wonderful experiences with my own children.

Gallup Family said...

I have to admit I'm addicted to Black Friday shopping..there's something about the craziness and adrenaline that makes me crazy I guess. Jared and I hit the sales that morning at 4 a.m. and my biggest complaint was the checkout lines that lasted 1 1/2 hours at Kohl's. I apparently really wanted that workout machine (let's just hope I put it to good use!) We were out for 4 hours and only hit 3 stores but we did completely finish our Christmas shopping so it was worth it.
When I was 9 months pregnant with Adrianna, I took Luke and Jaden to the store just to get out of the house. By the end of the trip I was in tears. The lady at the checkout, who was my favorite checkout lady at Walmart (which by the way is the only store in our little area so I am forced to go there), anyway this day she decided she didn't want to take my coupons and she kept making cutting remarks about Luke's behaviour. I wanted to run to Customer Service and demand a Manager but it just wasn't worth the extra 20 steps. I got in the car and vowed to leave the kids with a sitter from now on.
The sad thing is that now that I'm stuck inside with Adrianna all the time, I long for those trips to the Walmart with the kids :)

Mari said...

I used to love self-checkouts... I got so good at scanning everything quickly and bagging it correctly and I didn't have to wait in line. Then I had a baby and moved to a new town with different stores and different self-checkout machines. Sad to say, my self-checkout days are now over, at least until I'm not carting a baby around! I can only imagine managing three kids!

andrea said...

Great story, Destinee! Thanks for making me giggle.

janet said...

I was busting up reading this!! I hate the check-outs that are always yelling at you to PLACE YOUR ITEM IN THE BAG!!! When I started yelling back (at the one in Albertsons) the lady came over and showed me how to bypass that...but i didn't go back and I can't remember! Poor ole granny, why wasn't she a greeter??? EHHH??
as Mason would say...thats so SAAA-AAD! I will take your first born, or 2nd or 3rd!! ttfn

Jenny or sometimes Bozo said...

This is hilarious. You had me laughing out loud. I was in a grocery line with one person in front of me. Kid #1 was talking to himself and sitting patiently, kid #2 was screaming. The checker thought it was the best time to chat with the customer and I nearly put my things back in my cart and headed to another line. I've had this lady before, she's a gabber. But honestly, is she deaf and couldn't hear the crying?

Destinee said...

Beckii- you could buy lunch for $7.83!
Melissa- I almost called you because we went to your Target. But it was so last minute, I hadn't showered...
Inkmom, Where do you do all your shopping. I'd love to give up Walmart but it is just too convenient.
Chas, what kind of exercise equip did you get? I really want a treadmill!! Or eliptical.
Mari, I'm so glad you commented and now I've found your blog! Missed you on Sunday. Hope the little man is feeling better!
Thanks Andrea, Mom, and Jenny!

Carmen said...

That was a funny story Dest! I 'love' those kinds of days. ;)

I actually braved shopping on Black Friday this year -AND I was in VA...where there are tons more people and places to go. My sis-in-law and I headed out at 3:30am... (yeah, I know!!) Anyway, we hit Kohl's at 4:00am, got done just in time for Toys R Us at 5:00am, got done there just in time for Target at 6:00am! We waited in lines [to get inside the store and to check out] forever, but...once we got what we wanted and paid for everything it felt so nice! Also, I noticed that the "big ticket" items on Black Friday are electronics and jewelry...or bigger things/toys. Luckily, I wasn't in the market for any of that. ;)

Gallup Family said...

Dest, we got a Gazelle. I've wanted one for years. I've only used it once so far, we're working on where to put it so we can workout without the kids bugging us. When we tried to use it earlier this week, the kids kept coming up behind us and getting nailed by our feet. We think we'll move it to our bedroom so we can lock the door.